A year ago today, I ran my first marathon. Many moments of that day are still crystal clear: the heart-sinking sight of a monster hill at mile 22, the choked up feeling at the finish, the throbbing quads, the euphoric incredulity when I first said it out loud to my family on a borrowed phone: “I qualified for Boston!!”.
But it doesn’t seem like yesterday. It seems like years ago. I don’t feel strong anymore. I don’t feel ready, confident, fit or fast. I don’t feel like the girl who ran that marathon.
There was a time not too long ago when a 3:30 at Boston seemed more like a slam dunk than a stretch goal. Not so this week. This week was tough, really tough. The first few runs of the week were okay, but Friday’s long run pretty much peg-hammered my shoulders into the snow pack. I wanted so badly just to zone, to pick my head up and see the mountains, to let my mind drift. But whenever I did, I’d slip, trip or stumble. The ice was unforgiving, the studs on my shoes were wearing thin, and it was all I could do to shuffle through 13 miles, head down, studying every step. I averaged 9:45 pace for those ankle-rolling miles, about 60-85 seconds slower than my normal long run. Around mile 9, weary not from the run but from the battle with the elements, I started the self-lecture. It went something like this:
You’re lucky to be out here. You’re lucky to be running. Yeah, so you feel like a slug right now and yeah, you’re freaking out about every little niggle and twinge, but baby steps still move you forward. And remember why you’re out here, big picture, the end game…. You’re FRICKIN TRAINING FOR BOSTON.
I felt a little better after that. (Thanks, self). I’m usually my worst enemy, so it was nice to hear some encouraging self-talk for a change. I am still struggling with the comparison of where I’ve been fitness-wise versus where I am (and where I wanted to be by now). But I keep bringing it back to this: what can I do TODAY to prepare? What can I do THIS week to train? And whatever that answer is, it’s enough.
This week, 40 miles (my first 40 mile week in SIX months!) was the answer. And it was enough.
Monday- 7 miles (9:09 avg) – Ran outside with a friend. It was nice and clear and a balmy 15 degrees! Felt really comfortable and went by super fast.
Tuesday- 9 miles (8:30 avg) – This was my first “tempo” in six months. 2 x 10 minutes @ GMP (goal marathon pace) of 8:00 minutes/mile – 5 minute recovery jog in between. This one felt pretty darn good! My friend and coach Michelle ran next to me on the treadmill, which was a really great distraction and made even 9 treadmill miles go faster. The MP miles felt comfortable for the most part. One step closer to Boston!
Wednesday- 30 minutes weights, 30 minutes elliptical in the a.m. Then skate skiing with the kids in the pm. It was a beautiful night to be outside.
Thursday- 6 miles (9:20 avg). Really slick on the running path. Had to take it pretty slow to avoid flat out falling.
Friday- 13 miles (9:45 avg) Ugh. This was the awful one. So slippery and icy. I rolled my ankles (once each side!), I tripped on ice ruts, I slipped going up hills. And I nearly gave up around mile 7. Glad I finished it though, and made it through without any new injuries. I did have some beautiful views—in the 1% of the time when I could look up and see them!
My view Friday, if only I could’ve looked up without slipping or tripping…
Saturday- Off. Foam rolled and stretched the heck out of my tired legs.
Sunday- 5 miles (8:36 avg). Easy treadmill run in the am. Felt much better physically and back on track mentally.
Total: 40 miles, 45 minutes skate skiing, 30 minutes weights, 30 minutes elliptical
Posted by Basil. Check out more at Salty Running.